Monday, May 5, 2008


What is stress really?

Today was a very stressful day for me....getting things settled at work, so my staff won't be left stranded in my absence; worrying about how I will get my dissertation in tip-top shape amidst my cross country and potentially international travel(I might be bringing my laptop with me to Peru-ugh!); waiting for my camera lens to arrive via FedEx so I can take wide-angle shots of Machu Pichu; making sure I pack the right shoes for Jess's rehearsal dinner; explaining to my Mom that I won't be to her place till LATE tomorrow evening, cutting down on our time together...... Stress.

Holy Cow. I'm so lucky that this is the stuff I stress about. seriously. I will finish my dissertation, I am going to Peru- for the love a God! I have a fantastic camera and my Mom loves me no matter how much time we spend together.

I have been reminded on several occasions that stress is the physiological response that I know my body listens to in order to complete a task. It is not at all enjoyable, sometimes even sickening, yet there is still this wierd high I get from pushing myself and accomplishing my goals. This is an exercise in self-discovery and I'm feeling a deja vu coming on. I think it is so funny how while we are experiencing something, it can be the worst thing ever. For example, during my graduate education in Delaware, I was instructed to take Statistics on videotape. Big Mistake! I was in tears, crying to my Mom on the phone, thinking I would drop the class and never be able to get back on track. This caused me so much turmoil! Then I hired a tutor and finished my assignments and all that pain was gone like that! I only vaguely remember how horrified I was, because I found new things to focus my anxiety on. Is there a way to avoid the adversity freak-out part and still grow from our experiences?

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